Vol. 5, No. 1 • Fall 2000

Debunking Some Foster Care Myths
by Becky Burmester

Foster Parent's Perspective
There must be some magical aspects to the word �foster.� To care is to possess a wonderful quality, but to be involved in some way with �foster care� paints a variety of negative word pictures. Foster parents are considered weird or strangely good. Foster children are considered somehow less than children. By some stretch of logic foster children are supposed to feel lucky to be in a good foster home.

There are foster care facts that debunk the myths. Foster families are not extraordinary. Our family of four is quite ordinary. Our two children grew up sharing their Mom and Dad with children who, through no fault of their own, had to spend time away from their birth families. Children in foster care are neither strange nor weird. The 68 young children who have shared our home were individuals with very different personalities, but each was a very typical baby.

Children placed in out-of-home care are not lucky. They have little or no control of their lives. Others with limited knowledge of them as individuals make decisions that could affect the rest of their lives. Nearly every child in foster care would prefer to be reunified with his or her birth family. Roots are important, even if those roots are not fully functional.

Look at the pictures that accompany this article. Can you pick out the �normal� families from the �foster� families? Which pictures are of �foster� kids? Which pictures are of �normal� kids? Funny how everyone looks �normal�!
We are!!!

 

Becky Burmester is a foster parent and a member of the North Carolina Foster Parent Association.

Copyright � 2001 Jordan Institute for Families