I Have a Light, Somewhere in Me
by Justin Maxwell
Before you give me something to live for I need you to freeze, read the caution tape that I have tried to hang myself with since last January. Study the crime scene that sent me into foster care. My heart has been broken into, bashed and now abandoned. It has a no trespassing sign on it. I have irrevocable trust issues. Knock on the door of my reflection if you want the real me.
I'm warning you, I'm a downpour on a sunny day. I wear the same rugged frown and my head hangs. What's to look up to? Is there a God beyond the sunset? I'm weak. Settle in your bone structure in a non-threating position, and then I'll feel the comfort to spill the ink of me onto the paper.
Look at my face... fifty different shades of emotions within one day. The world is foreign to me. I know nothing outside of trailer trash. So, excuse the mess I always leave behind. Look into my eyes, not too deep. A child's ghost lives in my irises. My levee tear ducts break when the truth hurricanes from the gulf of my mouth. I have vandalized my skin. My scars are notes on the surface of my pain.
I may never give you grandchildren; my body is only interested in guys. My closet door was never really shut. I never had to unlock my lips to say, "I'm gay." Please don't judge me. I'm human. I have a light, somewhere in me. I just need help finding it. I'm unique. There's no one in this galaxy handmade and woven like me.
Are you going to pass the caution tape and save me from the crime scene I relive every day? Are you scared? I am too.