Kid’s Pages

What I wish that all resource parents and social workers knew about being in care isn’t just about having a roof over your head or food on your plate. It’s carrying the weight of loss, confusion, and constantly adjusting to new people, rules, and homes that don’t feel like yours. You blame yourself, wondering if you were too much or not enough. Getting dropped off at a stranger’s house doesn’t feel like safety. It feels like being passed along, like you don’t belong anywhere. Even kindness feels unfamiliar, and trusting it feels dangerous. Like in Demon Copperhead, survival becomes a way of life. You smile when you’re hurting, laugh when you’re breaking, act like you’re fine because being vulnerable hasn’t always been safe. You cry in your room at night, feeling alone in a crowd. At school, the label follows you. Kids joke about foster care, and you laugh even though it hurts. It feels like you’re walking around with a sign that says “foster kid,” and no matter what you do, it’s the first thing people see. You hear that you’re strong and people are proud of you, but that doesn’t erase the ache of wishing your real parents said it. Still, you keep going. You hope. You dream.  We don’t need pity or to be fixed. We need to be seen not as broken but as people learning to rebuild. We are more than what we’ve been through. We are still becoming. And that is something to be proud of.

As a teenage boy that has been adopted while being a foster kid I wished parents and social workers understood the importance of stability, trust, and understanding. I would want them to prioritize my education, which is very well done, support my development of independence, and help me plan for my future. By embracing these principles, resource parents and social workers can create a supportive and nurturing environment that empowers us youth to overcome adversity, build resilience, and achieve their full potential. This requires a commitment to ongoing learning, collaboration, and a genuine desire to understand the unique experiences we endure as vulnerable young people. Navigating the foster care system is a complex and often tumultuous experience for all young people. For a teenage boy in care, the journey is fraught with unique challenges including the loss of family, the instability of placement changes, and the struggle to maintain a sense of identity and belonging. Resource parents and social workers play pivotal roles in shaping the experiences of these youth, and a deeper understanding of their needs and perspectives is crucial for fostering positive outcomes. Moreover, to sum it up, there are crucial roles that resource parents and social workers need to understand they play and the right care and education must be provided to every child and their needs should be provided for. 

That when we move around a lot it makes it harder on us. When this happens we cant create bonds with people. Which makes it hander to share our story with people because we dont know if we can trust them. This is very true if therapist are changed because we cant express ourselves because we arent able to trust them. A lot of us have problems in the classroom because we aren’t told or helped because teachers don’t understand. We dont have ADHD we have trauma there’s a difference. The schools don’t understand trauma so to them we are trouble kids.

What I would like for foster parents and social workers to know about being in care is that it is sometimes fun and sometimes disappointing. The disappointing parts are having to move from place to place even at 5 am., unexpectedly-like being woken up and told to pack and to leave. I miss my queen bed and my TV, my purses and my own bathroom. Now I have to share everything with my brothers who are annoying at times. Every once in a while, we get to have fun. Sometimes we go to a water park and a pool. Other times we go to the Kaleidium and going to a craft camp was very fun! I also got my own bicycle and get to ride to places on the foster care campus by myself. Next week we get to go to Dollywood! So, these are the things I’d like foster parents and social workers to know.

I wish my social worker knew how hard it is to be in care. Going away from your parents and loved ones is very upsetting. I had a lot of built up anger that I took out on my social worker. I have been in care since 2019. When you have to go to a special home where you don’t know anyone. It is so hard when you have to leave your siblings. For anyone who is in care or going through a hard time, keep your head held high.